Best dating tip

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But now, with a decade (or more) of dating and relationships behind you, you can really listen to those signs and inner nudges so you don’t end up wasting your time and energy on people who bring you down. Here’s dating advice from 8 women on the front lines.

“Be entirely yourself rather than projecting a more muted version of yourself.

Past relationships and tons of not-so-good dates can provide lots of intel about what you want in a partner. Yes, obviously you want to be attracted to the person, but at the end of the day, what really matters are those inner attributes and core values.

Once you get clarity around your desires, which may require some self-reflection and sitting down with pen and paper, then start focusing on them.

Not in the mood to mess around with dead-end dates?

It’s important that you first get really clear about what you want, Virginia says.

You might want to settle down, maybe even get married and start a family.

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You might have tried really hard to make it work with someone you knew wasn’t good for you or you ignored a ton of red flags.But as frustrating as it can feel to watch the people around you get hitched and have babies while you’re spending your Friday nights going on a string of lackluster dates, there are a lot of benefits to dating in your 30s.There’s just something about your third decade that makes you feel way more grounded and secure in who you are.Your 30s is the perfect time to branch out from your typical “type” and date new people. “I’ve encouraged dating coaching clients of mine to date outside of their comfort zone, initially with resistance,” Spira says.“It’s often a wonderful surprise when they actually enjoyed dating a different type than the ‘bad boys’ from earlier days.” That’s exactly why Virginia puts such a strong focus on inner traits instead of what looks good on paper.

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